Here are some examples of ways you can respond to Im proud of you: These responses will show your appreciation for their words and will help to strengthen your relationship. They can be in dictionaries but over time can have slightly different meanings depending how they are used. Our children need to know that we believe in them, that we trust them, that we support them, that we love them, that we acknowledge them as individuals separate from us. After all, you were the one who put the effort into writing the report you did the research, you put the paper together. If you're more than a friend it's more loving. I wanted to know whether or not I was overreacting.He had no hand in my achievements and since he was the one who caused me those problems, I feel he has lost every right to use that phrase with me. The Next Giant Leap. "I'm so proud of you" In this sentence, "proud" being translated to is absolutely right, and is also OK. She was very rude and grouchy with me and reluctantly corrected her errors after I asked the manager to get involved. 4. He gets a "that's nice". You must be so proud of how you're doing!"). All Rights Reserved. I grew up being complimented for my looks . Be proud of who you are. Here subject and object are the same person. If you teach someone maths and they pass their exam same thing they are good because they have taken notice of your teaching. I am here for the same reason. Try either "I'm happy for you!" or, what I find more accurate, "You bring me joy." "You bring me joy," communicates the sentiment nicely. He thinks you're absolutely wonderful and he's pumped to be in a relationship with you; it's written all over his face. However, the other expression Im really happy for you is so overused that it immediately rings the bell of insincerity. Feb 10, . I felt great to know he as proud of me, especially after he had read my term report cards in high school. But, when you want to make your responses more effective and special, these are some good ways to do it. "We will always remember. Taking a few deep breaths can help you focus. Imagine this: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. Thanks. This mindset will help you achieve your goals, too. My friends tell me that rather often so like once every month or so, which I think is a lot, if you say it more often you'll take it for granted for sure. "Im proud of you!" Someone else's pride in you does not usually translate to pride in yourself. My sons grew up together and are spaced two years apart. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. Now, of course, its diminished if the person throws the phrase around too casually to colleagues, all family members, etc., but if they are a genuine and caring person, then I believe it shows a deeper connection. until recently when a Goddaughter won an amazing internship, beating 2000 other applicants, and her other Godmother put a message on Facebook saying how proud she was of her. For many of us, hearing this phrase is like a warm hug. The only people there who went to university were the pharmacist, the physician/surgeon, lab technologist, x-ray technician and the like, as well as the school teachers. She says "Good boy. JavaScript is disabled. First, he is probably higher status / higher power. It is arrogant. This is why we say, I am very happy for you! They are the one to feel proudit was THEIR accomplishment. Last Updated on February 28, 2023 by Ketan. Hosted by Pressable. As parents, it's important to stay calm and resist the urge to blame our kids or anyone else, really for our emotions. To try to sum this up, I mrried and ended up in a small, isolated village filled with people who either did not graduate high school or barely achieved that level of schooling. Without you, I couldnt do it. . You're not necessarily the expert. That way, all they have to do is show up. Kids also like to know that they invoke parental prideas long as it genuine! A strong argument is a solid one. Future Planet. After reading these posts, I think the following: a person will feel pride in anothers accomplishment when they feel deeply connected with the other. Sept. 29, 2020, 8:12 PM PDT / Updated Sept. 30, 2020, 5:34 AM PDT. Let them know you think it's great they're considering quitting and that you're ready to help. She says "Good boy. Let them know how much better you feel now that you're smokefree. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. My mother said it to me when I graduated from college and I will never forget it. Listen to your inner wisdom, and make a note of the meaning that resonates with you. Never downplay the way you feel about someone's abilities and effort. Id opt for saying, Im happy for you. Setting goals you can achieve, also called "realist goals," reduces the chance of frustration or doubting yourself or your abilities. He may understand you have daddy issues and need a masculine pat on the back. I wouldnt say Im proud of you in this situation. And you get to benefit from them regardless of the outcome of your relationship. This can help to create stronger relationships and can help to create a positive and constructive environment. The Proud Boys ' anger toward Mr. Trump has heightened after he did nothing to help those in the group who face legal action for the Capitol violence. And, that nearest person could be your parents, partner, or friends. I think you deserve the credit for this all. Is the childs achievement actually a reflection of their parents achievement? Wondering where that may be coming from. In what context. 15. But, it can also be a bit overwhelming because it puts the spotlight on us and can make us feel exposed. When someone says Im proud of you, its important to take the time to think about how you want to respond. Updated 7th September 2016; and 19th April 2019. Im excited, are you? Be proud of you." - Oprah Winfrey 3. From what I read, she falls into the category of know them well but I wonder if its not something a bit out of place. The most important thing is to show your appreciation and gratitude for their words. 9. But I would also add another category: people who know you well *because* they have worked with you and even for you for a long time. You will even fall in love with me again seeing the next surprise! 5. Thank you., Im honored that youre proud of me. Friend: "At least you have a job or daughter.". Tell me something else, Ive heard this at home. If parents don't 'approve' of their child, then they disapprove. The parent might have paid a lot of money, or given up time, to coach and practice tennis with their winning child. The best way to do this is to express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude for their words. Ben Casnocha It is a darn good thing that you wrote your opinion; that I found it tonight, and that comments continue to be accepted. When someone says Im proud of you, its important to take the time to think about how you want to respond. Why is this such a contentious phrase? Anyone could tell how proud he is to be with you by the giant grin that's plastered on his face when you two are together. Because we ran into a bunch of other classmates that were also there, we didnt spend time exclusively with each other but we did sit together at the game. Which brings me to my next point. I have never regarded the word pride as implying that the one feeling it is somehow responsible for it. Specialized in marketing, with 'communication' as a favorite subject, Ketan P. is a head writer at 'Better Responses'. 12. A hug or a gentle touch of the hand can even get this message across. You would have to know the whole story. My experiences with people saying they were proud of me (or at least making me aware in other ways that they were proud of me) first came from my own parents, mostly my dad. Thats why we feel pride in our childrens accomplishments. (thanks to TK and Andy for helping think this through.). Luke 18:9-14 ESV / 5 helpful votes Helpful Not Helpful . They may become adults who are vulnerable, who do not have a strong sense of self-worth. Talents Compliments. 2. 8. We are probably trying to encourage our children, and even instil in them a sense of pride in their own achievements. I was very irritated and angry. but you do play a role in their success! Thank you, mom and dad, youre the reason for this. When someone says they are busy, it could mean that they are busy. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude is also a great way to show appreciation to others. While "sb is proud of him" can express positive meaning. "How I do love you!" 3. Well, that means they're impressed, happy, and overjoyed with what you did, achieved, or say something. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? The Mindset of the Ambitious Educational Elite, Thinking Clearly about a Persons Substance Amidst Stylistic Differences, On Intentionally Vague, Mystique-Infused Explanations of Talent, Book Notes: Lost & Found by Kathryn Shulz, Mindfulness of Consciousness Meditation Retreat. Didnt your manager think you were capable of putting such a report together? Often the 'I'm proud of you' I get from strangers includes an unwanted and inappropriate familiarity, a hug a bit too long or a bit too hard, a knowing look and more emphasis on the 'I' than the 'you' in the 'I . If a parent can say, 'I'm proud of you', then can the parent also say the opposite - ' I'm disappointed in you '? I was excited to see your reaction. 27. By Ben Collins and Brandy Zadrozny. Someone who credibly says "I'm proud of you" usually has two characteristics. You haven't said who is speaking to whom. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. It's a way of congratulating someone for having accomplished something impressive. Thank you so much! You are using an out of date browser. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Thanks for making us proud. Better than nothing, Neil, but its sad, Mr. Rogers had to do what parents ought to be doing. Since first publishing this piece, I've spent many years thinking about, and discussing, why children might like to hear their parents say "I'm proud of you". It does not take it away from them. 4. "If by a "Liberal" they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people-their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties-someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is . If you get a new job, get a participants medal for a 10K or do anything deemed worthwhile, friends, family and acquaintances will say they are so proud of you!!!. I just graduated with my degree in hospitality." "Oh, a future barista," says the other guest, swirling his drink. A parent might say this to a child, perhaps. Love you so much. It's nothing bad or unusual. When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. . This is what makes the difference in whether the receiver feels great or resentful. You had nothing whatsoever to do with any of this you pond-bottom suckers.. I think that the phrase really bothers me, because its like saying, Wow, I didnt think you were good enough to ever achieve -insert whatever here.- My fiance said it to me last night while I was doing the dishes. Its just a colloquialism for way to go or awesome sauce or good for you! No one means to be condescending or imply they got you there in some way. Why are you taking the credit for my effort? (I'd prefer "Congratulations! Take the compliment, give her a big hug and a kiss and tell her "I'm proud of myself as well" and "Thank you". The words I am so proud of you sum up those sentiments. Like Im only worth anything just because Im making money? And why should I stop using this phrase? He remembers things that you tell him. Do you think if they didn't mean it they would say it? Congratulations on your graduation, dear son. 7. (I'd prefer "I'm really impressed with report - I can see how much effort you put in, and it's going to be helpful for the organisation". When my parents tell me that they are proud of me, I generally take it to mean that they recognize something I have done on my own merit as being worthy of praise. The Obama campaign needs to walk this one back and pronto. One of the wives of these manual labourers had befriended me in church and was an older woman. When you respond to Im proud of you with gratitude, youre also taking advantage of the power of positive reinforcement. Approval is different to acceptance. I would almost join FB in order to make the comment, Why are you proud and impressed? (My answer might surprise you. 4. But it had a very positive impact on this one child. These two simple words"I care"can mean so much to a person who may be feeling like the entire world is against them. thats a case of someone doing one-upmanship. And that's how I arrived at the "I'm Proud of You" litmus test. Second, he must know you well. 4 . Don't lose control of your emotions. What does it mean when a woman says she's proud of you? But worse, my friend thanked them. I say it often to former students. Also, theyre proud of you, when you do something like your family has been doing or you did something way greater or different than anyone in your family so far. This topic came to mind because I recently saw a friend / mentor and told him about a meaningful professional accomplishment. I have always seen it as, Ive been there, done that, and think you have done it too.. I do not believe that parents need to say "I'm proud of you" to show their support of, and their emotional connection to, their child. Ah. When someone insults you, the first thing you want to do is take a pause and a deep breath. 14. Your friend wants to say "I am proud of you too, my friend". We had a really nice time. No matter who they are, they all have one thing in common they make us feel loved. 2. I have never said to my children, I am proud of you. My reason is that thry are responsile for their successes and I shoudnt take any credit for it. I teach high school. Im proud of myself, although saying it out loud doesnt make it better. Lets look at some examples (followed by some suggested alternatives) adult first, then child, to help illustrate this point: Manager: "Im proud of the report youve written". Mull over various relaxing options, like meeting up for coffee or tea, and then send along one concrete plan, Manly says. 7. The key words (for this discussion) are creditable to oneself. How Do I Tell Him I Like Him The Best Method (Proven), What Does It Mean When She Calls You Daddy, Im so glad that youre proud of me. We laughed a lot and re-lived some old memories. But what exactly does this phrase mean and how should you respond to it? Lets see where we can go with this. Living with a parents disapproval, or continually seeking a parents approval, is a life-long burden. In this research, children of parents who never said "I'm proud of you" were significantly more likely to contemplate, plan or attempt suicide. If youve finally graduated or youre the first one who got an A + in your entire family, your parents express how proud and happy you make them. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and can help you to overcome self-doubt. It will also help to give you a boost of confidence. Health Gap. Usually friends say "I'm so happy for you" or "Really nice job!" 9. He's proud of you. Its powerful. How many people in your life can say, "I'm proud of you," and you take it fully and without any sort of resentment or dismissal? You could also feel patronised. Try these new and funny excuses to ask for money from your parents or your family. 8. Image used under license from Shutterstock, research suggesting that parents saying "I'm proud of you", protective role in a their child's mental health, Should Children And Parents Be Friends? How come you didnt come to watch this match? So, the next time someone says Im proud of you, remember to take the time to think about how you want to respond. Want to Change the Way you React to Your Children? I am certain that he would be very proud of you, and he would be proud of your decision to reset your life with rehab. . An acquaintance commented on a recent Facebook post I made that he was proud of me and immediately I felt so mad about that but couldnt figure out why. Especially when you get to hear this from your parents, it means they're happy to see you grow up the way they raised you. If you had a hand in that success then I think it is ok to say, I am so proud of you as it does imply that the speaker played a part. Yes, I'm sure you've come across "me too" in such situations, but it's very often ambiguous, or sounds arrogant. When someone knows that you are not only proud, but you are inspired and amazed, it will be an even better compliment. By being proud of me that person shares their mind and soul with my mind and soul and includes me in a certain extended period of that persons life. If this is the case, then of whom is the parent really proud? This will help to create a bond between the two of you and will strengthen your relationship. But, what would be the better ways to respond to I am proud of you other than just saying thank you. Initially this sit didnt sit well with me. My boys are all each others fan club and its marvelous. Language gets corrupted. Thank you so much for this great compliment. Stay in the know when we release new content! You look so much better!". If that's the case, I suggest a change of phrase. One man said, "I am so proud of my partner when we are at receptions together; many men are around her wishing to make love to her . 4. I also told her I had a great time & that she picks up my spirits. Thank you. Thank you for starting this. Use thirty phrases to say "I'm proud of you" to make the special person feel good and empowered. This post was actually very helpful for me! We all have people in our lives who make us feel special, appreciated, and respected. One of the most common phrases they use to express their feelings is Im proud of you. 1. Some years ago I attended a parenting seminar, where the speaker incidentally mentioned avoiding the phrase "Im proud of you". If you're an ex-smoker, you can draw from your own experience of quitting. What if you really are proud of the person? Ive had multiple people tell me theyre proud of me like my parents, grandparents, elders but it just doesnt mean anything to me, I dont have any emotional response from any of them and my response ends up being ok or yup. They are much more aware and can see through false motivation easily. 3. Im so happy to have you in my life, thanks! What, do you really? but not the p-word. I was actually kicked out of my house at 16 by her and her new husband and had financial trouble during my years in school that she had contributed to, how in the hell can she be proud of me when all she did was hinder me? Im proud of you could be seen as an external judgement a parents verdict on a childs performance. Proud Boys celebrate President Trump's callout to them during debate. Looking for some extra money from your parents? Its also important to remember the power of positive reinforcement and the benefits of responding with gratitude. But is that really very useful? Did I do anything extraordinary? I can point them out to my friends and say, Those are my sons!. I started to cry with the realization that in my 40+ years I had never heard it from anyone but him. In other words, I care so much about the other person, that their accomplishment can evoke pride in ME. They include: courage, commitment, imagination and compassion, and oh yes, patience -- lots of it -- because it doesn't happen overnight. They may start to see their parent as being insincere, or even manipulative. What is BBC Future? "Well," you respond with enthusiasm, "I'm so excited right now. Well, thats what we are going to share in this post. 11. Also, as bilabial says, I like the recognize traits he values in himself, like his thoroughness and carefulness. What are we trying to say or do, when we innocently, and with the best of intentions, praise our children with "Im proud of you"? The words hit me like a . Is your partner proud because they can now be associated with a high achiever? With teens and adults, saying "I'm proud of you" is a bit different. This is 20 years ago, and I still remember this moment. When your partner is mad at you, your flirty responses to I hate you will certainly make them laugh. Think of things people have often praised. 1. Just the way you look and react to your husband can give the impression that you are honored to be his wife. I believe many people do not understand and appreciate the expression Im proud FOR you. Here are seven possible ways to interpret his compliment. Happy I did it, finally! Like I wasnt doing enough before? The first time I remember hearing it said to me (though I'm sure there were times before the instance I'm describing . Tell Them You Care. Connect, Converse and Communicate Better. Why is your manager taking credit for the work you put into the report? I dislike the phrase entirely, regardless of how we are involved in the individuals life: parent, teacher, mentor, etc. She said yes and then she said she wanted to go with me. It says, I love you so much that YOUR accomplishment can make ME feel pride. Oh.. very good. Your email address will not be published. I'm so much proud of you for completing your graduation and wish you will succeed in every . Lost Index. The rest were manual labourers. To say you're proud of someone is to say that you can relate to them and, if in their shoes, you would be proud of the accomplishment. 5. Family Tree. Proud" as praise - an external judgement of someone elses achievements. That proud phrase didnt bother me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder, what does she mean when she says shes proud of me? Probably no big deal but would be interested in input from others especially other females. posted by aimedwander at 4:27 PM on May 17, 2015 . "), Friend: "I'm proud of you for being brave and standing up to your boss", As the friend who has found that courage, is this statement something you would appreciate? The other three sound as if you're saying you're proud of yourself too. Later, I saw her in a restaurant and apologized for balling her out in public. So, lets get started! 2. Those of us who were brought up around this attitude are understandably wary of the phrase, and likely to avoid it. There are some super special and engaging responses you can give when someone very close to you, says that theyre proud of you. 15. After reading this, I now believe its because I dont look up to him in any way and he doesnt know me so well as to fully appreciate my accomplishment like my family would. It's important to remember that the power of words goes both ways. I avoid "well done" or "good job" for all the reasons Ive stopped saying "Im proud of you". Thanks to you, as well for being such a caring and supportive partner. Based on the situation and who says this, heres a list of better responses to pick. So you better know in which tone theyre saying so. I again said. Move away from the source of your negative thoughts. To me, to be proud of someone, you do not have to be above them in any way although that is usually the case ie older or more experienced (or snobbish if that is how you are) To me, you do have to have some connection with the person you are proud of. Towards Net Zero. This will show your appreciation for their support and will help to strengthen your relationship. It means that in their eyes you have come a long way from a place you began. Bless me that I keep doing bigger things than this. Even if it's true, he says, "I don't want to think that I was walking around for a long time looking like hell.". When I tell my kids Im proud they are surprised and pleased. Most of the time, having pride about someone else comes from a place of superiority. The best way to do this is to express your own feelings of appreciation. I was an ambitious student with a goal to attend university, which my father completely supported. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. May God's blessings be bestowed upon you forever and always. True - the parent might have spent hours helping the child get their homework done or even completing the childs assignment. 1 y. If you're a friend, it's friendly. If you want to reply saying you're proud of the person saying he's proud of you, the only correct answer out of those four is "I'm proud of you too". You can accomplish anything that you put your mind to. Your partner is really happy about the achievement that you have made in your life or career. Whatever influence we had on the person, or information we gave the person, what they did with it is their accomplishment not ours. Sometimes people use it to appropriate the achievements of others, which is a sad and awful thing. Can "me too" be used here? Second, this very fact helps explain why we resent it if the praise comes from someone who isnt viewed as a mentor. Make sure to take the time to think about how you want to respond. . You know that I'm bound to see you. First, is there anything more emotionally potent than someone you really care about and admire telling you, Im proud of you?, It feels like I can name many movies where this serves as the emotional climax. Consider why you so are grateful for this thing or person. I agree with you: its sad that he did what my parents should have done. If a friend said it to me, I might say "Thank you", but I'd be thinking "Well, who gave you authority over me, then?". Date TBA. The reader alone is responsible for any action they take as a result of reading this website. Get your facts straight. Approval is a parent's judgement of a child's choices - and to a child, this feels like a judgement of them as a person. 1. They mean the exact opposite of what you think. Show your appreciation for their words and use your response to create a positive and constructive environment. 1. What Does It Mean When Someone Says I'm Proud Of You? Briefly, some difficulties include: Four-year-old John shows his Mum a painting he's just done. You might say: "I'm so proud of you for trying to quit smoking. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. I guess its an odd word and I stay away from it because I know how sensitive I am to it. I think children want simply to be accepted and respected as themselves. A very concise and articulate post. Most of the time, having pride about someone else comes from a place of superiority. Youre my friend, not my parents! Grandparents And Grandchildren: Observations From A Parent In-Between. I feel virtually murderous towards them. PJ. A teacher or a mentor can be proud of their student, but you can't really be proud of your peers. "Be proud of your scars. Suddenly I found myself questioning my rather lame Im thrilled for you. Well, that truly makes my day. Embrace Pride There are positive reasons to listen when someone says they are proud of you. So thank you, mom and dad! But one doesn't want to say that they're not proud of their country if they're looking to lead it. I am proud of them for being like this with one another. Praise such as this is a subject on its own much research and many, many books have been written on the negative aspects of praise. I got into a conflice with her sons girlfriend because this young woman was working in a store behind the til and had made a gross error in punching out my cash register amounts on my bill and I had to go and confront her to get a refund as the store owed me about $50 due to her errors. They often tell each other they are proud of one anothers achievements and they all know its genuine. Don't disguise it as concern, either. The Psychology of Bragging. "This isn't easy, but you did the right thing." Sometimes supporting a friend and letting them know you're proud takes the form of helping them cope with a difficult decision they made. I didnt expect that this would mean so much for us. In most situation expresses negative connotations, such as "He is very ", which means he is over proud of himself (). Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling. So - when a parent says, "Im so proud of you", is the parent taking the credit for the childs accomplishments? A Summer Like No Other - Bushfires, Fear, Famly, Hope and Change, Preparing To Say Goodbye Even As I Hug Hello, When I Realised That Being A Parent To An Adult Is Different To Being A Parent Of A Child, Setting Limits Sets Limits On Children Learning to Discipline Themselves, Learning to Take The Back Seat As A Parent, As My Child Moves To Adulthood, Am I Treasuring The Moments? Simply thanking them or hugging them is an immediate reaction to it. Im happy that youre with me in good and bad times. I cannot tell you how happy I am, for her, to witness her achievement and how much I admire her tenacity in overcoming all she has. Here are some examples of what you shouldn't say to someone on their sober anniversary. I cannot understand that and think he is misusing the word. implying a mentor relationship.
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